Same Feeling

Dear You,

You left this place a while ago, searching for relief. You so badly wanted to leave that the thought of coming back made you sick. You were finding ways to stay away from this place.. You wanted to go anywhere, but here. But still, I see you coming back to this place, happier than ever.
What happened? What changed your mind? How did you end up here in this place again?

Inquisitive,
Me.




Dear Me,

Yes, I wanted to run away and never return to this place ever again. I had my fears.
I guess, the more I stayed away from this, the more I understood what I was missing. It is true, that in a moment of confusion I started hating everything and did the best I could do, maintained my distance. But in no way did I erase it from my life, my memories, my heart.

It is true, when I have something, I really don't realise what I have until I lose it. And then I hope that the universe listens to my secret prayers, and gives me a final last chance to make my dreams come true.

Lucky,
You.




Dear You,

Ohhh.... Now you get it! This distance was like your 'brick wall' and you have finally learnt how to 'romance' with your brick wall. Doesn't mean that you have started accepting all that you get, or all that you can't change, but instead, you have learnt how much you love this place and the intensity of your feelings with which you want to come back. It shows how much you want to break down this brick wall to reach the other side.

Am I right?
Me.




Dear Me,

Wow, I never looked at it from that angle. Its true. I really wanted another chance, and I didn't want to waste it. So without thinking, I jumped right into it when I saw it coming. I don't usually do that, but this life has tested my patience, and is offering me another chance right in my hands this time. I would be a fool to even think twice. I wonder if I was so sure about something as much as this ever before. This makes me immensely happy as well as nervous. But if God has this planned for me, I will embrace it with open arms and ask no questions.

Optimistic,
You.

It is time… Time is now

Time to get fit, Time to dance,

Pick a partner, This is your chance!

Time to speak, Get the load off your chest,

I’m all ears, Just express!

Time to goof up, Make a mess,

Lets get started with all the randomness!

Time to finish, That didn’t end well,

Start a new beginning, c’mon what the hell?

Time to cherish, Time to love,

Someone who makes you feel you’re high above!

Time to become yourself again,

A fighter who didn’t feel no pain!

Let’s find a way back into love, Lets take this leap of faith together,

Don’t worry about the future, Time shows us what would matter.

I hope you read this someday, And know instantly it was meant for you,
For I still don’t know whom to call when it rains, But hope that soon its you!

Poke Me, Nudge Me, Stop Me!

Now don’t get me wrong here, Im not a stress freak.. yes I do think a lot, a little more than a lot actually, and most of the times, that thinking ‘a lot’ doesn’t get me anywhere.. but I do it anyways.

Recently, that is, in the past 4 years,  my thinking reach has gone far beyond normalcy, and my thinking speed has also increased immensely..

But its not like Scarlet Johanson in ‘Lucy’ Who can access more parts of her brain (although I wish it worked like that). Its more like wasteful thinking. The kind of thinking that gets you worried and stressed but doesn’t bring you to a conclusion, or the next step.

People do silly things when they are stressed. What do I do? I talk a lot, then I don’t talk at all (majorly cause im too busy thinking what to do). Then I try to run away from the situation by talking to friends (who are not related to the problem) and trying to explain the whole situation to them. Then I’d watch a movie/ listen to songs, go out for coffee alone, wash the dishes, cook my favourite dish, read, run, and recently I started pulling my hair when I got stressed (literally!).

As my stress levels increased, I started pulling my hair a lot more. It became such a habit, that half of the times I wouldn’t even realize that I was doing it! Then the hair pulling became such a habit that I would end up doing it even when I was not stressed! People started noticing, and pointing it out, which used to get me irritated and I would pull my hair even more. Because of people noticing it and making me feel that this action was odd, I stopped doing it in public (also cause it would ruin my hair style).

One day, I was sitting at home, watching an episode on my laptop from my favourite series and without realizing, my left hand reached the top of my head and I started pulling strands of my hair. I kept pulling my hair throughout the episode.  As the episode got over, I shut my laptop, switched off the lights and put my head on the pillow. The left side of my head was throbbing and it hurt when I pressed it against the pillow. I couldn’t sleep for 2 hours after that. Out of curiosity and worry, I took out my phone and searched for ‘Why do people pull their hair?’ … and not to my surprise, I found the main reason for this to be stress.

I didn’t really think I would write a post about this, but just needed to write it down somewhere, for me to remember how useless the ‘hair pulling’ action really is.

I still do it, but I am conscious of the fact that Im doing it… So I always have a choice to stop it. People say I do it lesser now, so there is some improvement! I tie my hair often, keep doing something or the other with my hands to keep them busy. If you know me and see me doing it, poke me, nudge me, tell me Im doing it… Stop me! It would show me you care, and I would be able to save my hair! :) 

Been a while

This is addressed to the dear people who followed me in hopes of reading something good/ funny/ interesting/ reflective from my end...

Dear Lovers,
Im sorry for not writing anything for soooo long. I don't know if I was busy (super busy) or was out of content (can't be that cause I had the most amazing last year of my life! and I have so many stories to share!). But maybe I just lost my will to write.. to write about me, my stories, random poems, incidents or anything. I just didn't want to write. A major reason for this could be that I had stopped reading. I feel reading fuels writing. I had stopped reading any king of material, be it books or news ... I only watched movies, series, or read fashion news. Not enough to feel the urge of producing my own content.

But now I am excited and I want my readers to be excited too! I am going to start writing about ANYthing and EVERYthing (for a new beginning), whatever comes to my mind and whatever I have missed writing about. Soon, this blog will start making sense again. And so will my life! :P

I dont promise to write everyday, but I declare that I will write at least one post per week. Good for a start?

And no, this won't be counted as this week's post. Interesting eh ;)

Stay tuned!

Hugs and Kisses!